Dating advice for germans and americans


10-Jun-2020 09:45

Here in Germany, it's not about the boy trying to impress the girl until she falls for him: it's about two people on more-or-less equal terms trying to make chemistry happen without being creepy.If you think he's made a move but then nothing much happens, he may be waiting for you to make the next move -- he needs to know you're as interested in him and he is in you.In fact, you may be experiencing attractions of deprivation, where you try to recreate the issues from childhood in your romantic partners.I'm an American girl studying in Berlin and through my conversations with some German guys, have begun to appreciate the differences in dating cultures of the two countries.Then these boys grow up and are exposed to the opposite sex in an abrupt, often sexualized way. This is definitely seen in how they treat not only women, but everyone around them.

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For example, in the Netherlands, comprehensive sexuality education starts at age four. Instead of cruelly dismissing someone by disappearing, they communicate that they are not interested. As the media in Europe is a lot more heavily monitored, Europeans grow up surrounded by media and images of women who are curvy, comfortable in their own skin, and sensual (versus overly sexualized).

The dynamic may or may not move into a serious relationship, but they are not trying to gather other options or back up plans in case it doesn’t. Americans (both men and women) have been socialized to play games, to act unavailable, to wait a particular amount of time before texting back…