Dating an alcoholic
In the earliest stages, most recovering addicts are trying to figure out who they are, what they want and how to be in a healthy relationship.
Beyond the first year, the longer someone has maintained their sobriety the more secure you can feel that you’re choosing a partner who is healthy and whole.
If they are in recovery, how long have they stayed sober?
Are they actively working a program of recovery (e.g., participating in self-help support meetings, counseling or an aftercare program)?
You’ll need to recognize these signs and get involved.
A history of addiction doesn’t necessarily turn Mr./Mrs. They’ve waged a courageous battle, spending a great deal of time working to take care of and improve themselves.
But before you put yourself in a position to fall for an addict, there are a few things you need to know: For anyone considering dating an active addict, it is important to realize that love cannot conquer addiction.
Addiction takes priority over everything – you, children, career, financial security, even one’s own freedom.
You can’t change your partner or their past, but you can control yourself.
In any relationship, setting and enforcing personal boundaries is an essential skill.
Even if it’s inconvenient for you, you’ll need to make allowances for your partner to go to meetings or counseling sessions, particularly in stressful times, so that they can continue to prioritize their recovery.