Dating vs marriage jokes
" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.
“You’ll get your chance in court.” said the Desk Sergeant. She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey, I am taking an off tomorrow so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again." The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran for the door.
When you look at him, you want to claw his eyes out.
Just looking at him makes you feel all "mushy." When you are married ....
A Single bed for 2 isn’t THAT bad When you are married ….
A King size bed feels like an army cot When you are dating…..
Love you." So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His wife suggests that he see a therapist to talk about it, but Bill vows to overcome this rash desire on his own. The man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, “You know, I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket.
A few weeks later, Bill returns home absolutely ashen. " "Do you remember how I told you about my tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer? " "I got fired." "No, Bill I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer? The bartender asked the man “Whats wrong,why are you so down today? The man said “My wife and i got into a fight,and she said she would’nt talk to me for a month”.
You think to yourself "Was he ALWAYS this hairy???? He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. "Bill has worked in a pickle factory for several years.Bill looks around the room and sees that it is in a perfect order, spotless, clean. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. One day he confesses to his wife that he has a terrible urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. You tell him "If we have sex, will you leave me alone???
You picture the two of you together, growing old together. You picture the two of you together, growing old together When you are married ….